bjorn2fish 4,612 Posted February 7, 2016 Report Share Posted February 7, 2016 Hains Signature for sale on Gumtree, funny ad, worth a read. I bet a lot of boats are sold with the same words being uttered. http://www.gumtree.com.au/s-ad/blackwood/motorboats-powerboats/2011-haines-signature-540f/1102245323?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=share&utm_campaign=socialbuttons We all love fishing, right?Apparently I don't like fishing any more - at least that's what I've been told by someone with more authority than me, but here is a ready to go fishing package - just hitch up, drop her in the water and go fishing the day you buy her!Oh, and I meant drop the boat in the water - not your wife. Dropping wives in the water is apparently not appropriate and/or appreciated. And if you can buy a suitable wife - good luck to you. I've already bought and sold one wife, still paying for the later model and have no desire to find out what it would cost me to sell her (the wife, not the boat).And the best news is you don't need a big tow vehicle - she can be towed behind a typical family sedan like a Commodore or Falcon! The boat is also the right size for towing behind a family sedan.You might have guessed I'm really disappointed to be selling my boat, but my wife has decided that the caravan is more important, so this great boat package simply has to go.She (the boat, not my wife) has seen very little use due to business commitments and my wife's desire to travel in the caravan instead of going out fishing. And let's be honest - if I don't sell the boat to get the caravan SWMBO wants, then I'm not likely to see much use out of my wife either.A really comfortable and stable boat - the cabin is big enough for two to sleep in and there is heaps of storage space inside the cabin and also on deck. Rock solid fibreglass hull.Please note that these are all words that should not be applied to your wife - comfortable, stable (as if!), big enough to sleep two, heaps of storage space and rock solid. These descriptions are only about the boat. Please, you have to believe me!This package is complete and ready to go and includes:- UHF (27 MHz) radio- all required offshore safety equipment including life jackets, flares, bucket, EPIRB and so on (ask me nicely and I'll even give you a life jacket for the missus)- Lowrance LCX-37C colour combination chartplotter and fishfinder (not that you need a chartplotter - apparently wives always know where you are and where you should be)- Bimini with clear sides and front- rod holder on the bimini- bait board (never used, at least not by my wife)- bilge pump (electric)- 100 litre underfloor fuel tank (which I will make sure is full)- Sea Trail galvanised trailer (with new winch)- PortaPotti toilet (for the wife's comfort and your peace and quiet)- anchor (should not be attached to any person, especially your wife)She (again, the boat, not the wife) is equipped with a 90HP Evinrude E-Tec outboard, which starts first time, every time. Heaven only knows what life would be like if my wife's mouth was as reliable as this motor.A 20 litre drum of E-Tec oil (worth over $300) also comes with the boat because we all know how important proper lubrication is and so you won't have to worry about buying lube, I mean oil, any time soon!As an added bonus we'll even throw in our tow tube which is shaped like a jet ski and you'll also get the tow bridle and tow rope. Capable of carrying three people, this tube is a bundle of fun and gets comments everywhere it goes.I have found that the tow rope is long enough to effectively mute your wife's screams too! archerfish, BarneyB, projoe and 11 others 14 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rybak 622 Posted February 7, 2016 Report Share Posted February 7, 2016 Classic!! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ludaqryz 290 Posted February 7, 2016 Report Share Posted February 7, 2016 Poor bastard lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
fishnuts 55 Posted February 7, 2016 Report Share Posted February 7, 2016 That's just GOLD Quote Link to post Share on other sites
lofty64 1,309 Posted February 7, 2016 Report Share Posted February 7, 2016 Hahaaaa good read ,i wonder who wears the pants...lol......still got a smile on my face....love it.... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Seeseacol 381 Posted February 7, 2016 Report Share Posted February 7, 2016 hahaha...I wish I could buy it just to meet this poor bugga Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Nikhum 16 Posted February 7, 2016 Report Share Posted February 7, 2016 Funny but not as funny as that 90 etec on the back... Really it's underpowered for that hull. jackmac 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
outandabout 373 Posted February 7, 2016 Report Share Posted February 7, 2016 More like a foot print on his forehead than a thumb print........... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Savage 297 Posted February 8, 2016 Report Share Posted February 8, 2016 Funny but not as funny as that 90 etec on the back... Really it's underpowered for that hull. I thought the same Nikhum. Its a nice boat but 90hp. Most 16 footers have option of 90hp and this is an 18ft boat. minimum would be 115hp surely.... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Dad 25 123 Posted February 9, 2016 Report Share Posted February 9, 2016 What a stunning endorsement for marriage ,not .Guy need's to grow some ball's or at least retrieve his from his wife's purse . Tinker and lofty64 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
seagypsy 1,182 Posted February 9, 2016 Report Share Posted February 9, 2016 classic Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Stealthy Fisher 51 Posted February 10, 2016 Report Share Posted February 10, 2016 Surely you would include the wife in the package. iron chef 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tinker 1,645 Posted February 10, 2016 Report Share Posted February 10, 2016 Keep the boat. Sell the missus. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
baitwaster 202 Posted February 10, 2016 Report Share Posted February 10, 2016 bahahahaha made my day! what a legend ! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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